Battle of Tinles IV: Round 2

 

Shaka wondered how the Jade Emperor would take this. Now that he was filling the most coveted position of Archon, he realized how difficult the postition was. An Archon can not make mistakes. One simple mistake costs an entire mission. On top of that, he had to explain his failure not only to his Emperor, but to everyone in the conference room. He was embarassed, but he held his head high and there was no way anyone could tell that he was not as completely confident as he looked. At least the Orcs and Lord Scarab's Kabal of the Violent Mist could take some of the blame this time.

J.E.: Now, this should be an interesting debriefing. I heard that the Violent Mist utilized the top secret experimental Ravager upgrade. I was so enthusiastic about seeing its results, that I gave Scarab six Incubi on retainer to help him break it in.

A.S.: I heard. Six Incubi was an immensely generous gift, my Lord. Our reports indicated that they had a total of 7 bunkers full of...something. Being that Orcs are about as subtle as hailstorm, the Space Marines were very well prepared for our arrival. With that in mind, I gave the order to destroy the bunkers and not worry about capturing anything.

J.E.: You're an Archon, now. No need for the pleasantries. Just address me as Sir.

A.S.: Yes, Sir.

J.E.: Edea, report.

Edea: The Obsidian Knights spent most of the battle in the woods. The woods were a lot thicker and longer than anticipated. I was forced to let the portal off in the woods with the hope that some of the other units would be able to move faster than us or lead us out of the woods. Our inability to get through left the Liquid Sword out of a good deal of the fight where we could have been effective.

Xhosha: I agree. The Emerald Knights spent a great deal of time in the woods too.

J.E.: Nice try, in any event. Masai, report.

Masai: Well, being that the Cobalt Knights were utilized for heavy support, We saw a lot. The Orcs did indeed move as fast as was rumored. As such, they took casualties first. Being that they are Orcs, they took some heavy fire. They managed to jump out of a truck as it was blowing up. Just about all of them got out alive. I don't like it. Fast and tough is a lethal combination. Anyway, the Violent Mist employed some Harlequins to work for them. I must say, in the battle they weren't as impressive as the fees I heard they charge. In fact, the Solitare did nothing but get shot to death by a razorback. The Shadowseer was more effective, however. The Scourges missed their target and wasted a lot of bullets. They really need to learn to adapt to landing transistions better. Meanwhile, that strange transport you were interested in appears to have been a success. It shook off a lot of firepower. Our Raider lost its weapon due to an annoying dreadnought. The Horns took casualties but kept going. They refused to fall back. They must have been crazed. In the midst of their misfortune, they still managed to break up the Blood Angel's Devastator Squad. They had them pinned and humbled, which was good because they were causing the most casualties.

On a more humorous note, we received reports that one of the Space Wolves killed himself with his own plasma gun. It's amazing how humans thrive with such crude technology. Speaking of crude technology, the Orcs had a Bomba that came out of nowhere and destroyed one of the bunkers. The Violent Mist had Haemonculi on jetbikes, what a sight to see. One of them sprayed a destructor upstream into the second story of a building and ate up some of the Space Wolves. To the Northeast, the Orcs took out a Rhino and most of the Space Nazis in it. While the Scourges maintained against the onslaught and were backed up by assaults by the Violent Mist Haemonculi and more Orcs. No one on our side was able to break up the Nazis once the Space Wolves and Blood Angels got together in the assault. The funny thing is in spite of the fact that the Raider lost its only weapon, the moronic dreadnought amused itself by trying to destroy it. After skidding off course, the crew decided to save you money by getting out of dodge.

J.E.: How nice of them. Nevertheless, we need to "whip" them into shape and teach those f*ckers how to aim. <the Haemonculi smile>

Masai: The Scourges were ineffective and they were finally whittled down to 1 guy, and that razorback destroyed the Orc battlewagon. It was ugly. The Orcs began taking heavy casualties, and it would have been nice to have the Liquid Sword back them up the way they backed up our Scourges. And one of the Haemonculi from Violent Mist took so much combat drugs that she overdosed and died. Green slime oozed out of her mouth, nose, and bloodstream. The Orcs had this thing called a 'zap' gun. Yes, a zap gun. It sounds ridiculous, but the thing doesn't miss. It destroyed the Uber-Speeders that the Blood Angels were cutting us apart with. Meanwhile, the Horns were whittled down to one last Reaver who brilliantly maneuvered his way through the urban environment and blasted the bunker...and the blast did nothing. He was done in by a dreadnought before he got to take another shot. Then the Space Nazis came through with a bunch of bikes that tore through the Orcs and the Violent Mist. As the Bomba came back to attempt to support, it was blasted out of the sky by that damned razorback. The Orcs did manage to destroy another bunker with that zappa thing. Snagrott thinks that we were hiding in the midst of the battle like cowards, and has sworn his eternal enmity to the Liquid Sword.

J.E.: Whatever. Speaking of our alleged hiding, did anything get accomplished up north?

Edea: The Violent Mist troops managed to take out a Land Raider, but regretfully the rest of us were too worn out after trudging through those woods and were largely ineffective.

J.E.: Shaka, this is what I want. Calisthenics. I want hard training and hard workouts. I want ballistical training out the @ss. Especially with the Reavers. Teach everyone to strike at the foundations of buildings so that they have a better chance at taking it down. Then go at the body of the building. In fact, I want you to go to Nolor with a small army. There is an estranged company of Ultramarines running the planet. You will be outmatched, but I don't care. You all need to get used to being underdogs. Those of you who survive will be worthy in my eyes.

A.S.: To hear is to obey.